My Spirtual Beginnings – Part Three

During this time spent on the Reservation, I spent a lot of time with the Shaman of the Tribe.  I asked a LOT of questions about faith, the Earth, God, and life in general, many of which I had my answers to, but wanted confirmation or contradiction to my thoughts.  Through his translator (he said he didn’t speak English, but I think he truly did, and probably well!) we share may conversations and I learned and grew inside myself significantly.  Many of his sayings and stories meshed with what I had began to form in my life as well.  I was at peace within myself and starting to find out more about life.

During this time with him, I participated in a handful of Sweet Lodges (no drugs or booze involved!), and many a night in awakedness thinking things through.

Near the end of the stay, in perfect English, hence how I think he knew it well, he asked me, “Why do you ask all these questions, you are a Shaman of this Tribe and Nation already, and you know the right answers!?”  This took me back significantly.

A few days later, the Tribe was called together for a Blood Brother ceremony between Charlie and I, and at the end of the ceremony, I was announced as a Shaman of the Tribe.

For the next few years I was taught the stories of the Tribe and Nation from the beginning of their time until then.  I lead several Sweet Lodges, counseled members of the Tribe when they sought me and helped out as I could, passing on the story of the Tribe and Nation as I could.

But every time I passed a Knights Hall, I felt I belonged there.  Occasionally that dream I had for three years would pop back into my sleep again.  In 2000 I began to feel that I was not where I needed to be spiritually.  I still felt that the Native American ways were closest to what I was looking for in what I had looked at over the past years, but I wasn’t were I belong, of this I was sure.

I began looking at all the religions out there that I had looked at before, but still found them lacking, and I kept glancing over Catholicism, but passing up, as it was evil and wrong according to my upbringing and what I heard around me.

But those people I knew that were Catholic all seemed happy.

And my little brother converted to Catholicism in order to marry his great now Wife.  And he was loving it, and very happy in his faith!  (And he was a Knight, going into those Halls I felt called into.)

I began to think….

In Christ.

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My Spiritual Beginnings – Part Two

When I was about 5 years old, while sitting in the back of the car, my dad drove by a Knights of Columbus Hall on it with a big colorful shield on it.  I asked my dad about it, and his comments were along the lines of “Oh, that is a Catholic Men’s group, kinda like the Masons.”

In my mind I said “I will be able to go in there some day.  From that day forward every time I passed one of those Halls, I would think, some day I would be going in there.  For a while, not too long ago, and before I started looking at my faith even deeper, I lived with my sister in Maryland, and not too far was a Knights Hall.  I told myself specifically that one day I would be able to go into THAT Hall…

That said, at the time my family was Methodist and didn’t have a good thought about Catholics, not that I knew the difference at the time.

As I finished high school, I joined the Army and went off on my own to face the world, and for several months did not go to Church, except at Basic, just for the break.  After all my training I was initially assigned to Germany, were a few months after I got there, I was assigned a new room mate, Charlie, who was Native American, of the Mescalero tribe of the Apache Nation.  We became good friends and I liked what I saw in him.  Due to a family death, his father, he returned to the States after only a few months however.

When I left Germany, I had a short layover in El Paso Texas, which I still kinda call home, why who knows, and while there, Charlie showed up on my door step and asked if I would come to the Reservation with him.  I did, and ended up spending my entire leave time up there.

Stay tuned for part three! 😉

In Christ!

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My Spiritual Beginnings – Part One

I was born into a Methodist family, and raised in the Methodist Church.   For many years I went to Sunday School most weekends, and many summers were partially spent in week long Bible Study Day Camps.  (We went home each day, but came back the next day.)  It was, and is, a good foundation in the Christian faith, but didn’t feel right as I came into my teenage years.  I still went to Church with the parents, but inside I wasn’t sure I was in the right place.  Even in high school I started looking at other faith systems through the library and friends at school that went to other Christian centric Churches and participated in other faith systems.

During this time, from my 15th Birthday (that night actually) until the night before my 18th Birthday I dreamed, EVERY NIGHT, of being clothed in a white robe with a brown hooded thing over it, and a blue belt holding it all together.  Hanging on the rope was a beaded item with a crucifix (I called it a cross in my dreams not knowing the difference), and around the neck was another, oddly (to me) shaped crucifix as well.  I can remember in this dream trying to change the “habit” as I now know it from what it was to an all back or all brown habit, with a white rope, as that was what I had seen in the movies of the time, with Friar Tuck, and others.  It never worked though, I kept coming back to that habit…

This is what I saw myself dressed as!

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